Thursday, December 20, 2012

Stockings! Salads! Sangria! Soaps! Oh my!!

Hello family!!!

So hopefully you are all feelings very spirited!!

Now I recently moaned about how I have nothing to open on Christmas. That's okay! I went shopping and bought a few small things from Santa :)

Christmas in Australia revolves around the dinner table and booze! There is always meat and salads and sometimes seafood too. I'm taking pies and dinner rolls to our Christmas dinner. I'm excited I'm not making a ton of stuff!

I decided to go traditional and do stockings. Because I LOVE Christmas! So what's in the stockings?

1. Lip balm
2. Lottery tickets
3. Reindeer horns (pictures to come)
4. Protein bars (for me)
5. Candy (for Jono)
6. Socks
7. Hand buzzer (one of those things that shocks you)
8. Mini bottles of booze
9. Breath mints
10. Soap

Just little fun things for Christmas!

Now I've been trying to decide what I'm going to drink on Christmas day. I think since it will be over 100, I'm gonna go with sangria. Sweet, icy, juicy, cold. Sounds perfect.

Love you all!


Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Tori's Twelve Tuesday: things I suck at

Happy Tuesday! I will be doing a regular Tuesday Posting titled Tori's Twelve Tuesday. It will obviously highlight me and have a different feature theme for the week.

This week is things I suck at! I know you probably all think I am amazing and can do anything. Not the case, but thanks for the flattery!!

1. Laundry. Just can't do it. If I'm wearing clothes that are clean then laundry clearly isn't a pressing priority. I like to procrastinate when to do my laundry and procrastinate the actual laundry process.

2. Cleaning. I respect those of you with spotless homes. I try. I do. It's just maintaining two homes at optimal cleanliness is not realistic. I would totally do a 30day clean home challenge, but split between two places it would only be a 50% success.

3. Doing dishes. According to Jono, I am not even skilled at loading the dishwasher. This I believe is not true, his ENTIRE family has a "method" for the dishwasher, I have the Tori way... It's not up to the method standard.

4. Handwriting. I was ambidextrous until 4th grade then had to choose a hand. My evil fourth grade teacher Mrs. Z (I'll elaborate in the future on her evil ways and how i am scarred for life) made me choose right. I believe she was wrong, because my handwriting SUCKS.

5. Shaving my legs. I have blonde leg hair so you can't really see it until the sun hits it at the perfect angle, then you can REALLY see all the places I missed. How is it that I miss the exact same spot repeatedly?

6. Driving on the wrong side of the road. Okay I wouldn't put this at a suck factor of 10 out of 10, but it is hard... And my judgement is off for the left side of the car. Thus my third flat tire I got yesterday. Oops.

7. Drinking milk before it expires. This has become a recent sucky development. I think it is due in part to the fact it is not the organic hormone free skim milk that I grew up on. I don't actually want to drink it, probably why I suck at drinking it!!

8. Planning. Okay I don't exactly suck at planning, but I don't like it. Also, I think planning has it's place. For me it is in my work world. I want my personal life to be as unplanned and free flowing as possible. Thus I purposely suck at planning, it keeps me balanced.

9. Hanging up clothes. This probably ties into Laundry, but nothing bothers me more than all the clothes at the bottom of the closet from falling off the hangers when I suckily hung them!

10. Running. Okay I suck at it. Big time. I am actively working on this. I realized my breathing really affects my running and I need to focus on it. Also, I run with my feet pointed out a bit causing strain in areas that should be relaxed. Any of you that have seen me run know I flail. My trainer and I are working on running techniques to improve.

11. Blogging. Maybe not blogging, but blog design. I might get a blog makeover for my Christmas present this year!

12. Making rice. I burn it. Every time. Give me a souffle over rice any day.

Hope you enjoyed! Feel free to suggest themes for coming weeks!

Love you all!


Monday, December 17, 2012

Christmas List

Helloooooo World!

I am a huge procrastinator in some respects. Example: I was super organized and bought my entire family Christmas presents in November. But I didn't even get around to putting them in the mail, so I'm just going to fly them back to the US with me and have them be late presents.

Now Jono is also a huge procrastinator, dependent upon the situation. Here we are merely a week before Christmas, and I KNOW without a shadow of a doubt that man does not have my present. Three reasons.

1. He has been either harvesting or cutting hay or baling hay since mid September. He hasn't left the farm unless it is to deliver grain or pick up a part for a broken machine.

2. No way did he buy me a Christmas present before September, because I sure as he'll didn't get a birthday present that month.

3. Let's be honest, what man does buy a present really early? Lucky lady if he's your man!

Am I upset? Eh. I was upset at my birthday 3 months ago, but he's going to make that up to me on our trip to America. But he is stressed and tired and hoping it doesn't rain and has a hundred things to do before we go to the US. So no I am not upset in the least.

Butttttttt. If I wake up on Christmas with nothing (thanks for that rest of the world) my heart might break a little. So I compile a list of things that can be ordered and gifted via iPad at any hour.

Hope everyone else is on top of their Christmas shopping!

Love you all!

Sunday, December 16, 2012

Sunday Ramblings

Happy Sunday!!

This is a collection of events and random thoughts. Enjoy.

1. Who decides to be a gastroentomologist? I understand being a doctor, but one specialized in the process of poo? Someone please explain.

2. This weekend has been crazzzzzy. By that I mean lots of food has been eaten and wine consumed. It's left me TIRED! Last night we had a girls night and Christmas party. It was a blast!

3. I feel like my hair au naturale is way too intense for my profession. So I generally fix it with my straightened and wear that for 3-4 days. I use dry shampoo between workouts and it doesn't look gross.

4. I missed my big curly hair. So I washed it today and rubbed a bit of coconut oil through when it was wet and sprayed in some water, gel, salt concoction while wet. Below was the finished product. I'm digging it. Hello new summer hair.

5. I'm a big pale on my body. I have tan arms and legs from running outside, but I have some shocking tanlines. I am laying int the sunshine on my giant beanbags trying to remedy this. Mom, I'm wearing sunscreen.

6. Weight watcher magazine is my favorite! I don't do weight watchers and never will, but on the 12th of every month I get this magazine!! Jonos sister gave me a bunch of her old ones at the beginning of my weight loss mission, and I loved reading them for recipes and motivation.

7. I'm on a weightless mission, to seek and destroy all jiggly parts.

8. Water. How much water is too much? I drink 2-5 liters a day. Too much? Okay? Just wondering.

9. I hate laundry. Laundry has become so difficult since moving to Australia. It's no longer step 1. washer step 2. dryer step 3. think about folding but realize my clothes are wrinkled again so I'll just turn the dryer on again (repeat this step 3-4 times or until you've worn everything in the dryer) step 4. Finally fold. no no no. Here it is step 1. Wash step 2. Hang on line step 3. Take off line (or else your clothes will get holes where the clothes pins are) step 4. Fold. Steps 2 and 3 are hard. I don't like the taking off the line part. So I leave them out. It's just like an outdoor closet.

10. I lost 2 pounds this week, but may have eaten it back in the last 24 hours.

Love you all!


Thursday, December 13, 2012

I'm a boss.

I know two posts one day. You are over the moon!

Just an update. I am awesome. I am now advanced in Pilates and am wearing 2.5 pound ankle weights on each leg! I know. I'm a boss.

This is such an amazing achievement for me!! As someone that has struggled with lower back pain and core strength, I never thought I'd get to where I am today!

I am not saying it is easy, nor have I perfected all of the advanced techniques. But hell to the yes. I AM THERE! Eight months ago I couldn't even get through the beginner level without serious pain and agony during class and the next day. Rachael (my seester) knows this shiz is hard!

I love Pilates. You work muscles you didn't know you had. It's adaptable for any fitness level. Even if you are seriously injured or overweight (like I was 8 months ago) it is doable. Plus who doesn't love an exercise class you can do laying down?!

My recommendations, get a thick mat (or use two), find an instructor that will challenge you, make sure you have the technique down (a beginner class will teach you the right moves), and remember to focus on the target muscle group for that exercise (Pilates will only work your body as hard as your mind makes it).

Love you all!

You may applaud my accomplishment now, and hopefully very soon be appreciating my buns of steel (kidding).


Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Fa Ra Ra Ra Ra Ra Ra Raaaaaahhhhh!

I love a Christmas Story. I love when TBS plays it 24 hours straight. And usually in the proceeding days I will have already watched it once a day. (FRA-GIL-EY must be Italian!) I sadly don't have a copy here, but as soon as our data download for December starts over that is going to be my number one stop!!

Obviously I have to do without things living in a different climate and culture (btw happy holidays can suck it!). I have done my best to adapt (really just steamroll my friends with my traditions). Thus this weekend we are having a girls dinner, which I promptly renamed "Girls wine night and Christmas cookie exchange" (in reality it's really girls getting drunk and eating- not classy sounding). I am taking mint chocolate cake balls and cookies. I doubt many other girls will bring dessert, but we shall see!

The weekend after this is Christmas Karaoke at the pub! The Ettamogah Pub (I'll elaborate upon this establishment in the future). There is a costume contest so I am trying to think of the BEST costume ever. I know funny ones always win, but I want to DAZZLE. I am thinking sequins and lights, and obviously a battery pack for my lights. And we get to karaoke Christmas Songs! HECK YES!

I have Christmas music playing pretty much non stop. I downloaded the top 100 Christmas songs. Tragically they are elevator music versions, like jingle bell rock is not rocking, and that is usually my jam. So stop number two for new data in December is going to be more Christmas songs!! Most of you know I can't sing, but that doesn't stop me from thinking I can.

One big tradition Aussies have are Christmas Crackers. You sit around the table cross arms and hold onto the persons on either side and pull. They go bang (think party popper bang, not Fourth of July bang), then there is a little paper crown, a stupid toy, and dumb joke. Maybe this is the Aussie equivalent of a pre dinner blessing? Weird.

Last year due to my lack of snow, I made snowflakes! I could be a superhero in that picture, with a snowflake mask and the power to freeze! I digress...

Strudel Tagen (my dog for you people that may not remember) was a Christmas puppy! 7 years ago she wiggled out of a stocking on Christmas morning. Tear. So cute. This will be our last Christmas apart! She comes in March!!

And for all of you that posted about sights and sounds on Facebook... I have a picture of the inside of the tree from two years ago. When I miss home I hold it above my head and spin in circles. Just like the real thing. And people say I missed out? Ha!

I hope you are all enjoying the festive season! Love you all and MERRY CHRISTMAS! (eat a bean happy holidays)


Tis the season!

Once again. I had an entire post and it was deleted into cyberspace. I'll rewrite it tomorrow! For now here's a throwback picture of me and my big circa 2008!

Love you all!

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Success! On track for today!

I am really upset! I just wrote a fantastic post for y'all and it disappeared into cyberspace.

After letting my inner fat girl have an entire post dedicated to food, she behaved herself and let me stay on track for my fitness goals today. YAY!

According to my fitness pal I should be down another 13 pounds in 5 weeks if I always ate as I ate today. I'm not overly concerned, losing weight gets harder as you get lighter. My goal is 10 pounds by Feb 1!

Workout schedule for the week:

AM Personal Trainer cardio and strength
PM 20-30 minute beach walk followed by Pilates

AM Personal Trainer cardio and strength
PM 20-30 minute beach walk followed by Pilates



AM cardio/ strength circuit

Thanks for the support my loves!

Love you all!

Monday, December 10, 2012

'Merica Food


I hope all of y'all are enjoying the cool weather in Tejas! It is hot and sticky here. Yuck.

Anyhow. I will be in the land of Mexican food, margaritas, and Jimmy Johns in less than a month. All I can think about is food. What I want to eat and where.

I have no idea how I am going to maintain my weight as I eat across Texas. I thought I would list my favorite foods I really want. I am beginning to realize I have an unhealthy and fatalistic approach to food. I should probably see a psych about it... I'll worry about that tomorrow.

Now my ultimate list of food!

1. Jack in the Box Tacos
2. Salt Lick
3. Breakfast tacos
4. Garcias
5. Jimmy Johns Italian Club and Tuna Slim
6. Wendy's Chicken nuggets
7. Melting Pot
8. PF Changs
9. Happy Hour at Grins
10. Brunch at Palmers
11. Mexican Martini at River Pub
12. Chicken fried steak
13. Chick Fil A
14. La Madelines
15. Flemings Steakhouse
16. Japanero Latino sushi
17. Popeyes red beans and rice
18. Sonic limeade
19. Starbucks salted caramel hot chocolate

I think that is a good enough list for now. Believe it or not, I actually feel better.

Thanks for reading, sorry if I made you hungry!

My Fitness Pal

Heh roh peoples!

So I got the app My Fitness Pal to help me track calories and friends can see what I am doing... Ahhh!

I did really well all day. And then. BAM. I was hungry, it was late, it was hot (90 at 7pm), dinner wasn't ready, I had work to do at 8pm before my 10:30pm conference call. So I cracked a lovely bottle of ice cold wine and couldn't stop at one glass (okay that made me sound like an alcoholic... Eh oh well). I only had 2 1/2 glasses!

And I ate dinner had my chocolate fix and was done for the day.

Or so I thought.

Womp. Womp. Womp.

I had finished my part of my conference call and was just listening.

Then the urge hit me. I wanted something salty. I had soy crisps. That didn't do me. So then I had Dixie drumsticks (don't ask they're weird and Australian crackers). I had to walk by the pantry to go to bed and grabbed one last piece of chocolate.

No wonder I am awake so late. Wine, chocolate, work that is a lot of stimulus for my brain.

And goodnight. 1800 calories for the day. Fail.

Sunday, December 9, 2012


Hello my friends and family!

So some of you may have noticed I was a bit bigger last year when I came home. I've now officially hit my goal of losing 40 pounds!! I am so incredibly happy.

However, I want to keep going and lose another 15-20 just for the sake of being awesome! I've been sabotaging myself and eating everything in sight.

And you all know I love to get my cooking and baking on for the holidays. Plus this time of year makes me miss home like crazy!!

Luckily I have a great group of friends that are okay with my American traditions I force down their throats!! And we are having a tree decorating party next week. But I need to stay focused on my weight loss.

I am not slacking in the exercise department. I'll run 3-4 days a week, 2 days high intensity interval and weightlifting with my trainer, and 1 day Pilates. I have been taking one or two rest days. It's only been in the past couple of weeks I increased my exercise past 5 times a week total.

So my goal right now is to lose 8 pounds by February. A pound a week. Please help me do this. I love you all!

Enjoy my before and in progress picture!!

Tonight for dinner I am making healthy meatloaf. Hopefully I stay strong with a small serving!!

Friday, December 7, 2012

Rain Rain Go Away!

It has been raining here non stop! Which is really aggravating for two reasons.
1. I am ready for summer and sick of wearing black tights to work.
2. When it rains Jono can't harvest, and then has to wait an extra few days for the grain to get to an acceptable moisture temperature. I am ready for harvest to be over!!

Anyhow, we had sunshine and a heavy wind. So we went to see how the paddock was. I drove the fire ute, and then frolicked in the sunshine while Jono did other stuff.

Notice my sundress? Probably not farm appropriate, or safeworks approved. BUT! I have this theory I like to call the sundress theory. If you wear a sundress, the sun will come out for you! Not exactly foolproof or is there any hard evidence supporting it.

So everyone cross your fingers and toes and say your prayers that the rain stays away so that work can get done here! I'm ready to spend my weekends at the beach fishing!!

Love you all!


Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Weekend Wedding Recap

I had the biggest blunder ever!! I booked my flights and hotel for the week after the wedding. Holy mistakeness! Luckily the airline managed to move my flight to get there.

My hotel could not be moved, and every hotel in Melbourne was fully booked. Luckily, Jono's dad was watching the bride (jonos sister) and grooms kiddies at their house (the couple was at a hotel). So I was able to sleep on the couch at their house.

Now let's stop here. Children. I'm not interested. They wake up way way too early. Like crack of dawn ridonculousness. I cannot handle that. I am 24 and have the right to be selfish and sleep as much as I can. Back to story.

I flew in at 11pm and went straight to bed, but couldn't fall asleep until 2 am.
Melbourne is 3 hours ahead of Perth. Children wake up at 6am. This put me awake at 3am by my body clock, with only 4 hours of sleep. Not cool.

Anyhow. I have a lovely picture of how I felt for your viewing pleasure. The wedding was gorgeous, and everyone was so lovely to me! I couldn't believe how welcoming they were, even though I didn't have Jono!

We drank and then we ate. Boy did we eat. It was a 4 course meal at a wonderful restaurant! I mean wonderful, and I am really critical of restaurants. It was a celebrity chef and the main delight was meat! Every course had 6-7 options, so it was a gorge fest. I'm still full.

Enjoy the pictures of the pig. A whole pig! My inner redneck came out and I ate the tail and an ear! Haha! I also had two glasses of champagne and a red wine at once, not sure how that happened.

So we partied all night and headed back to my couch. I fell asleep at 2am again. My return flight was moved to early the next morning. Not okay.

So once again with 4 hours sleep I was headed to Perth. TIRED. Those that know me, know this is bad. (highlight that I did wrangle a krispy kreme! Sadly could not make it to find my ben or Jerry)

I drove straight to the farm, took Jono his lunch, and sat on the header with him. He knew I was tired when I spontaneously started crying over pretty much nothing.

I went to bed at 8pm and woke up 12 hours later. Almost restored. Not quite. I still felt like I needed naps yesterday and today. Hopefully tomorrow I will be a hundred percent! Overall it was wonderful!! I loved it.

Thursday, November 29, 2012

Dear Ben and Jerry

As some of you may know... I LOVE Ben and Jerry's. LOVE. LOVE. LOVE. However, they are not available in Perth, and it breaks my heart a little bit knowing they don't love me as much as I love them. I felt compelled to express my concerns to them via the comment box on their website.

For your reading pleasure:

Dear Ben and Jerry,

Let me first say that I love you. In a very non creepy way of course. You are always there for me when I want a chocolatey morsel of pleasure. You have even become so innovative to offer my favorite flavor, Chocolate Fudge Brownie as a frozen yogurt. I cannot thank you enough for caring about my healthy, and simultaneously supplying me with deliciousness.

I really appreciate all you do in an activist sense as well. You are such a well rounded corporation with a great foundation.

Initially, I selected the complaints box and was re routed to here for my general concern.

I moved to Australia two years ago, and have been struggling to cope without my good friend Chocolate Fudge Brownie as a frozen yogurt. I understand you have scoop shops in Melbourne and Sydney. However, I have the misfortune of living in Perth (it would be a perfect place if you're ice cream were here).

Anyhow, I beg of you, please open a scoop shop in Perth. For the good of the people and the good of my sanity and soul! Or you could begin selling them in stores, I am sure Coles and Woolworths would welcome you with open arms. If you do pilot your product in Western Australia, please let me know. I will drive miles and miles to taste some delicious fudgy brownie- ness.

Never fear. I have a weekend trip to Melbourne planned and will hunt down your scoop shop there. I look forward to the yumminess that will soon be mine. Please feel free to send me gallons of ice cream, if you have devised an adequate shipping method. If this method does exist, please tell me about it so that I can fly gallons of chocolate fudge brownie back from Melbourne.

I appreciate all you do Ben and Jerry. You are fine gentlemen, but please help Perth become a better city! We need you here.

Yes. That happened. But it is true. I will be in Melbourne soon!! For the wedding. And yes I WILL find the ben and jerrys.

Love you all! Sorry for no fun pictures!


Two a days. Plus ramblings of work. Plus sleepy girl.

I committed to a 7am workout with my trainer, because I had a cocktail event and wouldn't be able to do our usual 5pm workout.

Now those that know me, know I LOVE to sleep. If it were an Olympic sport, I'd be a gold medalist. I am seriously a champion sleeper. You also know, I'm a grumpy grumpy little lady when I don't get my sleep. Most people consider 6-8 hours of sleep perfect during the week. WHAT?! No. I need 8-10 preferably 10, but I'm good with 9, 8 is pushing it.

Dealing with a 14 hour time difference for work does not really allow for my 10 hours of sleep. Basically if I need to catch them during working hours I have a slim window before bed and waking to speak with them.

Last night I had a call at 11pm. I was tossy and turny all night, and had a follow up call at 6 am to ensure business was happening. Because really my job is about kicking ass and taking names. Business wasn't happening and I wasn't happy, but once I got to the office I got that shiz in gear Tori style. (you are probably lost and have no clue what I'm talking about)

Anyhow, I had my early morning workout with my trainer. Ow. Ow. Ow. I did manage to burn 550 calories and work my muscles big time! After my workout I rushed to the office to do said ass kicking. (anyone keeping track will realize I had less than 7 hours of sleep due to said calls to the US)

I got through the busnasty (business, kidding it's not nasty. I just like the way it sounds, pronounce busNASTY for correct emphasis). And decided to fit in a quickie run before my cocktail party.

Three reasons for the extra run. 1. I knew I'd have a drink or two at the networking event. It happens at 5 o clock with free alcohol. And I wanted to run off those empty calories before I consumed them. 2. I'm trying to get skinny! 3. Seriously forgot the third reason... I'm trying to remember it.

So end product. Very tired Tori, just dragging myself in from my cocktail party. I only had two drinks! But having a brain ticking about my job since 6am. I'm done. Time to shut down... Oh wait, I have another call at 11pm tonight. Cool. NOT!

On the upside! I took pictures of my neighborhood on my run. And let the cuteness begin. Plus my dinner thrown in for good measure.

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Scary Storm

It is just a stormy stormy night!! And day. I woke up this morning and immediately had a call to the states for work, I was supposed to have one last night but fell asleep before I got ahold of the office there. One of the fun things about a 14 hour time difference!

I took my call, and then just laid in bed. I tend to do this every morning for about an hour. I accomplish nothing, just googling, facebooking, some skyping, pinteresting, nothing productive! I love this hour of my day, but really need to cut it back to 30 minutes.

After I finally got my butt out of bed I was in a huge hurry to get to the bus. I threw a dress on and ran out the door. Only to realize a ridiculous storm was brewing. I was dressed for sunshine, had no coat, no tights, no sweater, nothing!

I got to my office, a bit cold and a little damp. I worked ALL day until 7pm, didn't take a lunch break and missed my Pilates class, which means I also missed my run. Sad panda.

I am working to a tight deadline for one of my clients. I waited all day for approval on my whirlwind trip, but didn't receive it until it was too late to be viable. Ugh. Corporations! At least I avoided a red eye flight, and 6 flights in 48 hours. Sheesh.

I have another phone call tonight for work, maybe this explains my tension headache. My brain never gets to turn off! Always something to do right before I wake up or as I'm going to sleep.

Sorry I needed to vent about my stress! And I included a couple of pictures from my office, just a day of doom and gloom!

Oh well! Tomorrow is a new day! Love you all!


Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Hot! Hot! and a Demotion

Not a real demotion, one on the farm. So hold your horses!

Today I completed week 5 day 2 of my C25K. (for those keeping track, yes I'm behind) It nearly killed me. I need to learn to get my butt out of bed earlier, because temperatures were soaring, I got a massive tan in 30 minutes. It was only about 86, but darnit the sun has a bite here like no other!!

I did manage to run the whole time non stop, not fast, just steady. Plus my HR monitor said I was working above my max heart rate limit for the second half of the run. No wonder I felt a little faint!

Some other news. My thanksgiving splurges caused me to gain a kilo. Upon reflection, for 48 hours not once did I think "I'm hungry", only "gosh I am full"... Probably explains the weight gain. Now to explain to my personal trainer this afternoon... Scary. Kidding, she is great! But I am doing two a days to lose the weight :)

So I received a demotion on the farm. Not really sure why (maybe I overused the CB radio and talked a bit too much?). But instead of being the head escort, with yellow flashy lights... I just got to drive the fire ute with no air conditioning and no flashy lights. Sad.

I'm sure I will eventually work my way back up to escort, with the long fancy trailer! For now, I'll stick with sandwich making.

So I realized, I have showcased very little of my corporate life. I'm about to embark on a whirlwind business trip, so will keep you posted on it!

And this weekend is Jono's sisters wedding in Melbourne!! Woo hoo! And guess who doesn't have a plus one! That's right. This girl. I'm going alone to my own boyfriends sisters wedding. So I guess I'll just drink a lot?

Love you everyone!!!